The Samford Crimson

Issue date: 2/27/08 Section: Opinion

It’s hard to say no when the pushers come around, talking pretty and telling you everyone does it. I’m done, though, and I’ll never go back.

I’m tired of the nosebleeds, the shakes, the headaches. I’m tired of people staring at me in class, bobbing my head to music that’s not there, chewing on coffee beans, my pupils wide enough to drive a truck through. I’m done.

It started out innocent. I needed something to get me through the day. I’m not a bad kid, you know?

But pretty soon I was taking way too much. It came easy – the pushers lived right down the hall, and I could go to the library and get it any time I wanted. 

It felt so good the first few times. I felt like I could do anything. I could stay up all night, get a few hours of sleep, wake up, take more and be fine all the next day.

Soon, though, I couldn’t have fun without it, and I started lying about how much I was taking. I was good at hiding it. Nobody said anything. Most of my friends were hooked, too, so I guess it was easy to ignore.

Things got bad the week before Jan term. My buddies and I were headed out to California for a three-week road trip. This meant we’d be away from the pushers and would have to stock up for the trip.

We called them up and asked how much we could get – two cases. Just two cases! That wouldn’t last a week. Sure, there’s plenty of it on the West Coast, but with no trusted suppliers, we’d have to spend good money to get it.

The road trip came and went. Then we got back to Birmingham and caught word that our main supplier was getting out of the game for good. She was moving to softer stuff: Vitamin Water. This meant one thing: there would soon be a lot less on the street, so we’d have to stockpile. 

I’m ashamed to admit it, but we turned to theft – waltzed right into a pharmacy student’s apartment and took 100 cans from his fridge. With four guys living in my apartment, this lasted three weeks.

We didn’t even keep them in the fridge – we drank them lukewarm. It wasn’t about taste anymore – we just had to get through the day. When our supply dwindled, we used whatever we could to get the fix.

I found that Starbucks’ Komodo Dragon Extra Bold has the most juice of any over-the-counter coffee you can buy, but you can only get it certain places. When I couldn’t get the Dragon, I’d grind up normal beans into really fine powder, fine enough to seep through the coffee filter and get into my mug, adding extra juice.

Three days ago, I told a buddy I was getting out for good. He said it’s impossible, that I’m in too deep. Maybe I am – I don’t know. I do know one thing: I can’t live like this.

After three days, I’m still clean, and the shakes come less often now. Things got pretty wild the first night, but I’m through the worst of it. I’ll never go back. It’s a destructive lifestyle. I’m a shell of who I once was.

I’m not judging anyone who’s on it. I know it’s tough. Trust me, I know. I just want you kids to be smart.

So when the Red Bull girls come around, just say no.

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